There is only two kinds of people in this world,those that mind and those that matter.

Those that matter don’t always understand what you do,but they usually don’t mind.
Those that mind what you do,don’t f*****g matter!

Thought is one of the greatest gifts bestowed on humanity by God. So why do so few of humanity think of God?

Ignorance is the state of unknowing, Emigrate now!

Working for this company is like smoking dope. The more you suck the higher you get.

If intelligence is the Sun some people are like Pluto.

What is the difference between Prince Charles and a bald man. One is the heir apparent and the other has no apparent hair.

Give a hungry person some food and you feed them for one day. Teach them to farm and fish and you feed them for life!

The only safe fast breeder is a rabbit.

Between men and women there is a great gulf. Learn to swim now!

I have half a mind to join the NF. Half a mind is all you need.

The British are kind to inbred genetic defectives. Just look how they revere the Royal family.

When I get old will the calves of my legs be cows?

If life is a joke will someone tell me the punchline ?

Heroes and small shoes don’t admit defeat.

There is no future in time travel.

The wages of sin is death. But the hours are good.

Women’s bodies belong to themselves. But it is nice to share.

All this beer drinking will be the urination of me.

Shoplifting is an art that you pick up as you go along.

Little things please little minds while bigger fools look on.

To err is human. To really mess things up get a computer.

Bosses work to the mushroom philosophy, They keep us in the dark and feed us bullshit.

If you laid all the people in the world end to end, you would have to be one sick individual.

Why is it that countries that were once deemed third world are now called mineral rich ?

My, my, how things have changed. The Arabs from the third world have brought the second world and put a firm down payment on the first.

Why worry about tomorrow because tomorrow never comes, because when it arrives it’s today, so why worry.

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